I got paddled once at school in 6th grade (this was in the '70s when they still did that shit). Two whacks for talking during class or maybe it was because my desk was messy. The teacher let me choose between two paddles (an evil all by itself) and I foolishly chose the one with holes drilled in it (which leads to greater whack speed and less surface area hit). She took me out in the hall and her first blow missed badly - hit me on my hamstrings behind my knees and they kept hurting for days. She said “oh that one doesn’t count” and hit me on my ass twice more.

Weirdly enough, she had marched with Martin Luther King Jr. during the civil rights era and played his “I Have a Dream” speech for the class (not on the say day as my paddling, though).

At least if she’s deported she can’t be buried at Trump’s golf course.

Or using stairs. “Ooh. Ah. Ugh. Argh.”

Are you kidding me? That’s a daily double punchable face. The mouth is smiling but the eyes are making sure the battery cables are firmly clamped on your nipples.

Oh, we’re weary all right.

I mean, imagine if friction worked like this. You’d push a heavy object … and it would move to the left (or maybe the right?) like it was on ice.

FWIW I do have a Physics undergraduate degree. It doesn’t help in this case.

For me, the weirdest thing is that when a charged particle moves through a magnetic field, it experiences a force perpendicular to the direction of motion; this results in the particle tracing out a curved path through the field. Like … what the actual fuck? Why in hell would the universe be this way?

Next you’ll be telling me there are active oil wells in downtown Los Angeles.

Our only actual “improvements” helped companies hire unskilled labor instead of union tradespeople.

It was tee-ball, I stopped playing after six months.

I played t-ball. I struck out in every at-bat … in t-ball. Fortunately I excelled at defense: coach put me in right field and the other teams were so scared of me they never hit the ball there.

I used to work for a small programming/consulting company that had somehow secured their own $12 million annual piece of federal pork. The money was ostensibly for “improving” manufacturing in our state so they couldn’t just pocket that money. Instead, one of our employees administered the fund from a rented closet-sized office elsewhere in our city and doled it out to other companies which in turn hired our company’s consultants at absurd hourly rates (for example I was paid about $40 an hour but was billed out at over $300 an hour) to do shitty work on useless projects.

This was only one of our scams. We also hired retired colonels from the various services and paid them $200K a year to not show up very often - we had an entire wing of usually-empty offices for these people while those of us actually doing some work here and there were packed like dogs into cubicle kennels. These colonels helped us secure lucrative defense contracts.

The funniest part of this job was listening to my bosses raving about how “welfare queens” were destroying the country.

STOP DOXXING ME!!!

Russian blue! AKA “grey cat”.

I would add Kids in the Hall.

KLF is gonna rock you.

“I cut myself in half and became two of me.”

Where I live, a few stop signs have a square white sign below them that says “EXCEPT FOR RIGHT TURN”, i.e. you don’t have to actually stop if you’re turning right. It’s incredibly fucked up - it works fine if you’re a local and you’re familiar with these signs, but people new to the area don’t know anything about it and if they’re on the crossroad they actually expect the other driver to stop since all they see is the backside of the octagon. It’s pointless to have these signs anyway since people usually roll through stop signs as it is.

Why would you have failed? You are supposed to come to a complete stop at a stop sign.

It’s hilarious to me that Musk claims to work 100 hours a week but he’s the CEO of five companies. Even if the claim were true (and of course it isn’t) it means being the CEO of one of his companies is a 20-hour-a-week job at best.

I know many people who believe that “right on red” means they have the right of way to make the turn and don’t have to stop first or yield to traffic.